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I Miss My Dad

My dad (38 year old father of 5) comitted suicide on (New Years day) Jan 1st, 1999. I was 17 at the time and I was the one that found my father on the back porch lieing after he decided to take his life. I remember it like it happened yestarday and would do anything to bring him back. I never told my father how much I really loved him and how important he was to me. If I could speak to him today I would just want to tell him how much I miss him and let him know how important he was to me but most importantly I would want to ask him why? Why did you do this to me? I don't know why he did what he did but I do know that I am going to remember that day for the rest of my life and I think I deserve to know why. I love my father alot and I hope someday my questions are answered. I have never seek conselling because I feel that I deal with things better on my own, however I am glad that I found someone that I could share this with, even though my questions are not answered it does bring alittle ease getting it out.

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