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I Miss My Dad

My dad passed away Sunday morning about 12 AM. It has almost been a week now. He was a big huggy bear of a man. With big strong hands and a deep voice. He had a sweet smile and a beautiful white beard. All his clothes are still hanging in the closet right here in front of me. And we keep feeling like he will come through the door. Relatives are leaving and we are scared of how we will feel when all is quite and the house is still. There is such a big whole in my heart. I keep waking up to the reality of it and it hurts all over again. I don't want everyone to leave. I don't want to be alone. I want to scream so loud and let him hear me. I know he is in a better place but it does not help the pain of the loss. My parents had separated three or four times and finally got it together and things were so good then bam he was gone from damn pneumonia. I keep thinking that if I had been here a little more I would have heard his cough and took him in before his lungs filled with water. he drown in his own fluid. It hurts so bad... Daddy...............

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