I Miss My Dad
Hi Everyone I hope this letter finds you all well. My name is Adelle and I am 19 years old. Almost 11 years ago I lost my father in a farming accident. I have to admit that even though it was really though.. the real trials started about a year ago. It was time for me to graduate and when all the other graduates were dancing with their fathers.. I was dancing with a friend of mine who's father is in a home. She didn't seem to care much, but I had a hard time. Not to mention the fact that I am an emotional person to begin with, my father was top notch. His number one priority was his family. I know he loved my mom, brother and myself more than life itself. He was a quiet man, with not a lot to say. This doesn't mean he was stpid, he would just rather listen to everyone else than talk. He always said he already knew what he was thinking, he just wanted to know what everyone else was thinking. Recently, I have had a really hard time. I moved out with my best friend and shortly after we moved out she had a stroke. I am glad to say that 6 months later she is doing much better! Thank you God! The point is that those two things were major milestones in my life and things that I wanted my dad to see and be there for me. I know he is here in my soul, but some days it's very hard to remember. To help myself I perform a sort of ritual every year and if this helps any one that reads this then that is the intention. Every year I write a letter to my dad. I tell him all of the highlights and then tell him all of my feelings about the things that happened. I then take the letter, signed and sealed, to his grave site. I sit down and talk to him. In a way it just feels like one of us is on a trip and just catching up. Of course I know that neither one of us is ever going to return from this "trip" but it gives me a chance to bond with my dad. Another thing I do is sometimes I have days that go by that when I relly miss my dad and so I write down all my frustrations. I put the piece of paper in the compartment where the spare tire is hidden in my car. No one reads is and when my frustrations are over and I'm more mellow about missing my dad I burn the piece of paper. This helps me because it feels like I am burning the pain. I don't know if this helps anyone, but it helps me. I also just wanted to say that it's ok to miss your dad or loved one forever. I know I will because he was such a huge part of my life. I just don't let it consume me and I keep on smiling because I know that's what my dad would want. Thanks for listening and I hope I helped someone. I love you dad.
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