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I Miss My Dad

Dad you too had drink prolems which effected my relationship with you.You took away my childhood but i dont love you any less then the rest of these people writing to their dads.I just envy them for having had those good years together.I barely remember my childhood with you dad and cant understand WHY?Where they such bad times that they are better off left buried?I need answers.I have suffered badly since your departure and nobody really understands.I had your first granddaughter shortly after you past but i had her for all the wrong reasons.I wanted someone to love me as i only felt i had you and like you i do not fit in with the rest of the family.I even married young looking for that some one to fill your gap but as with alot of things in my life that failed and in turn i failed you.I do hope you are around still in spirirt and now even though i still struggle with depression i hope you are proud of the changes i have made.If i was given one wish it would be to see you one last time.To know what you think of my new partner and of your grandchildren.However,more then anything to hear you say you love me as i dont ever remember hearing it.I love you dad and you will always be in my thoughts.love susie ps I am going to include you in my wedding in 2005 by keeping a sit free in the church with your favourite flower a rose.

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